Today is my birthday

Hello everyone,

I don’t usually write directly to my readers – I prefer my poems and stories to do that – but today is my birthday and I wanted to take the opportunity to say thankyou to everyone that has ever visited my blog. The encouragement I get is a big part of what keeps me going.

Now that I have turned 20 I have been thinking about my journey so far and so I want to share 20 things I have learnt about myself.

  1. I am a solitary person – I like to be on my own a lot but that doesn’t mean I like being alone.
  2. My family is really important to me and I try to stay in touch with my sisters all the time. They don’t always do the same and that hurts me, but I am learning to accept that part of it is my own neediness and the rest is their way of doing things. It still hurts though.
  3. I like teaching people – I work as a tutorial leader with a group of undergraduates and also part-time as a swimming coach. Sometimes I wonder if it is because of my need to be wanted and useful but I really do enjoy it when I see people learning from the things I teach. I’m not sure I would want to be a teacher on a full-time basis though.
  4. I am an emotional person and my day is often a rollercoaster. I can be happy and content one moment and the next a sad song can reduce me to tears. That’s when I do most of my writing.
  5. I like to work things out for myself – which I guess is more about being a solitary person – but I think I am a good leader. People seem to respond to my quiet ways of going about things and are always looking to me for advice.
  6. I have a thing for nice clothing and shoes. My studies in gender suggest that this is all a social construct to keep women and men in their places but I like to pick my outfit for the day based on how I feel and often when I know I look good it makes me feel good. As a feminist I’m still trying to work out how I should feel about that.
  7. I have a small number of really good friends that I would do anything for. Some have been friends since childhood, but I think I give more emotional support than I get.
  8. I love being creative. This doesn’t mean that I think I am talented but I do get a real buzz from creating things, whether it be writing, music, photography, drawing, cooking or sewing.
  9. I like to be neat but my room often ends up in complete chaos by the end of the week. Then I get stuck in a pick up all the clothes from the floor and put them away before my messy side takes over again. My desk looks the same.
  10. I like discussing things with my friends. Sometimes they think I am arguing but really I am just trying to understand all sides of the question. I also question things all the time and that drives some of my friends crazy.
  11. I was extremely shy and lacked confidence as a child and for most of my teenage years. I think I have gradually learnt to be more confident and I take a deep breath and throw myself in at the deep end before my shyness can take hold of me.
  12. I’m not very good at following directions. I’m always getting lost but luckily I have google maps on my phone.
  13. I read too many romances when I was younger and this coloured the way I thought about my relationships. I am single at the moment and right now I think I am happier and more free that way.
  14. I love the idea of having children one day – hmmm, maybe in another ten years or so.
  15. I go through periods where I don’t talk much and then there are days when you can’t shut me up and I feel guilty for dominating the conversation.
  16. Sometimes I am a nerdy girl and love all things science fiction like Doctor Who and Star Wars.
  17. Other times I am a sporty girl and try to keep fit by running, swimming and cycling.
  18. I like being in nature and love nothing better than walking in the rain (under my umbrella of course).
  19. I write on paper. I’m not sure what that says about me but I usually prefer to write in my journal first before typing it into my laptop later.
  20. I’m looking forward to the next 10 years of my life.

Love always,

Molly-Louise

xx

 

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